Being a Sub-five

Here is my life, being a sub-five on the looks scale. When I was a teenager, before I had to go on medication for schizophrenia, I was a 3 out of 10 on the looks scale, because I was 60kg and 180cm tall.

Now, being roughly 120kg and 180cm tall, I am now a 1 out of 10 on the looks scale. I have a huge belly. It is a medication belly. If I reduce medication, I’ll end up in the mental hospital, where they will put me on more fat pills.

Fat pills are anti-psychotics, because the newer generation of anti-psychotics almost always cause weight gain. I wouldn’t take them if I didn’t need to. But if I don’t take them, I could get seriously unwell.

I remember when I was acutely unwell in 2017, I dropped down to 89kg. But that wasn’t enough, because I gained a whole lot more by taking more medication than needed.

Plus, I’m a sub five, as women will not even consider me, because I don’t have a job. They may be willing to overlook my jobless status if I were a chad, then I could be eye candy.

Lol

Daily writing prompt
Describe a random encounter with a stranger that stuck out positively to you.

I’m guilty of attempting to start conversations with many strangers in public, notably female strangers.

I apologize for not being chad enough to be able to pull women.

I remember I was at the automated checkout, and I was trying to go between an asian couple who were at opposite registers, and the hot lady wasn’t looking where she was going, and walked into me, trying to get to her husband. How embarrassing for her, to bump into a sub-five, overweight man.

When I was 100kg, I started a conversation with a japanese lady by saying ‘excuse me, do all the trains go back into the city?’ And so I found out where she was from, and spoke a little japanese to her. I was still a sub five back then, in 2017.

I apologize for being ugly. I apologize for having a sex drive. I apologize for existing. I apologize for being a man.